Welsh
firm to export bananas to Spain
An innovative start-up company has been launched
outside Swansea, Wales by local entrepreneur Gryffyn Jones to
export bananas to Spain with the help of a government grant of
£250,000. Mr Jones got the idea for the firm when a banana
plant, which he has had in his front garden for the past fifteen
years, suddenly yielded its first crop during the recent heatwave.
Commenting on the development, Mr Jones admitted that the firm's
first shipment would be a modest one - one box of 30 or so bananas
being sent to a cornershop in Extremadura - but he has grand visions
for the business to expand by growing organically. The bananas
themselves are short, green and powerfully pungent.
European
heatwave reaches Scotland
Scotland recorded its highest temperature
since records began yesterday when the thermometer at Edinburgh
Castle reached 67 degrees Fahrenheit, prompting Jimmy McMoone,
a local man, to strip down to his kilt and overcoat and jump into
the nearest pub.
However, despite Mr McMoone’s enthusiasm, the hot weather
has not been universally welcomed, as Dr Jimmy McFighter of Edinburgh
Hospital explained: ‘Hoots mon, it’s been murder.
We’ve had local people falling like drunks with heat exhaustion.
In some cases it’s so bad we’ve had to hook them up
to a drip and fill them with pure alcohol just to bring them round.’
Madman
given legal aid to sue himself
Multiple personality disorder sufferer Zac Papperel,
of Birmingham, has been awarded legal aid to take Susan Papperel,
one of his alter-egos to court. Mr Papperel is taking the action
in order to obtain rights to see Billy Papperel, his imaginary
son. Legal experts fear the case may be dismissed on sanity grounds.
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