Liberty to be returned?

President Bush has failed to confirm or deny rumours that the USA is to return the Statue of Liberty to France. Speaking from the North Lawn at the White House Mr Bush stated: ‘Yes, we are not happy with France. But look folks, talk of us shipping out the Lady is a little premature. For a start what would we do with another huge hole in the ground?’

The French have expressed their intense disappointment with the US over this latest development. Speaking from Paris, French Foreign Affairs spokesman, Luc LeMarre commented: ‘This is a great insult to our republic and its people, and a considerable inconvenience. Where does America think we can find an orifice large enough to cater for the Statue of Liberty? We would look to President Chirac for a suitable solution, but he’s on vacation in Baghdad.’

Rumours that the Statue of Liberty is to be offered to Iraq in return for a clean shot at Saddam have also been refuted.